Mega Millions Winners: What To Do with All That Money?

With $640 million buckaroos on the line in yesterday’s Mega Millions lottery it does make one wonder (a lot) about what they’d do with the money if they won. Almost everyone I know bought at least one ticket, I bought nine—why nine? Frankly I’m not sure!

The odds of winning were unthinkable to none but still someone does indeed have the winning numbers of 2, 4, 23, 38, 46 and the Mega Ball number 23. I didn’t have to stand in a line to buy my tickets and utilized the “quick pick” type of choosing allowing the computer to pick my numbers randomly.

My husband and I sat on our back porch last night, looking at the new trees we just had delivered and planted and I asked him: “What would you do if we had the winning ticket?”

Well, he said, I’d hire a private jet and take you, me and our six dogs to Alaska. I’d have a private shuttle van or limo there to take us to see our Grandson Gabe and then we’d simply drive around until we found a house with lots of acreage we could fence in—maybe even water access.

Yes, I urged him! This would be awesome! I too loved the idea of living in Alaska—preferably Wasilla so I could see my Grandson Gabe every, every day!

We talked about how we’d payoff our home in Austin and the home we own in Taos New Mexico. We’d hire professionals to pack up our personal stuff and only pack lightly on our private plane trip. Let the flunkies do it for us—no packing or lifting any boxes for us ever again!

It was funny how the idea was “perfect” for both of us, but after 22 years of marriage you sort of finish each other’s sentences and understand the likes, dislikes and habits of your mate.

Next came the talk about friends and relatives who are hurting financially and would we do anything for them? We both quickly said we’d do anything for “the boy” (our grandson—we did buy him a Hybrid Ford Escape when he was only 4 and  the license plate reads “4THEBOY”) and of course since he lives with our daughter, we’d throw lots of bucks her way. We’d also help my Mom—she lives in a condo in Phoenix. Heck we’d probably take her with us just so she could be my forever Scrabble partner and build her a guest house on our new property in Wasilla.

It’s hard to beat my 84 year old Mom at Scrabble but I would have the rest of her life to try! And, we could do it every day so my chances of winning would increase! We’d enjoy tiny sandwiches with no crusts and drink Mojitos all day long maybe! Or, maybe I’d just spike her coffee making my chances of winning even higher!

We’d buy snow machines and a boat—we’d need our own plane because in Alaska, that’s like owning a car for some folks.

Maybe we’d knock on Sarah Palin’s door and see if she wanted to go shopping or compare private jets. Or, maybe she'd show us Russia! If she wasn't home we could ask hubby Todd to point out Russia!

To all my readers, friends and family: What would you do if you were the $640 Mega Millions winner? Drop me a comment and let me know!

Image Credit: Alaska / Wikimedia Commons / GNU Free Documentation License

ATTN Employers: Are You Being Mean Because You Can? Is the Economy Enforcing Your Mean Behavior?

I’ve noticed a trend lately and it’s not a nice trend. Employers know how difficult it is to find a job so the employees they have are being mistreated.

They are yelled at, discriminated against, punished for no reason, embarrassed among their peers and well, it’s just a mess. There are too many mean bosses out there and if you are guilty of this, even with the bad economy, this will only last so long—your employees will eventually abandon you!

I’ve interviewed people where I live in Texas and wasn’t surprised by the mean behavior their bosses, supervisors and top dogs pushed forth.  Those I talked to fear if they quit they’ll get bad or no recommendation. They fear if they leave they won’t be able to find a job—and we all know jobs are scarce.

When the movie Horrible Bosses came out, sure it was a laughing-type-of-fun-movie but in today’s world, employer meanies are more the norm than not.

Threats and even emails are sent to employees. Bosses threaten benefits and loss in wages. Basically, these mean bosses do what they want and are getting away with it.

These mean bosses are smart too. They have documented behavior maybe for tardiness a few times and even if the employee has improved in that area, they use it as the “last straw that broke the camel’s back” to help them win unemployment claims—that’s not fair to employees who live in this world of day-to-day fear.

I have a friend who told me they were practically assaulted by their employer but since they need their job and live from paycheck to paycheck, they don’t feel confident hiring lawyers to help them. Gone are the days of EEOC or Department of Labor complaints—employees really are that scared and employers and businesses are taking advantage of these fears.

Employees Are Full of Fear

I know my poll of interviews isn’t scientific in any way. It was just random sampling of friends and neighbors but most say the same thing—their bosses are meaner!

And, beyond my non-scientific poll, I found an article on MSNBC by Eve Tahmincioglu – “Hard Times Drive Some Mean Bosses Over Edge.”

The story quotes an executive recruiter, Marc Goormastic who says he knows of a CEO “threatening to throw a sales manager our of a second-story window because he hadn’t made his quota of personal sales calls.” Goormastic also points out this behavior “was totally unprofessional, and illegal.” Yet these mean bosses blame the economy for their breakdowns which is totally unfair to employees.

What’s sad is many people fear losing their jobs in a tough economy with unemployment rates at an all- time high—so they put up with illegal behaviors from bosses instead of reporting them. In Tahmincioglu’s report one person she interviewed didn’t even want to reveal his real name and was simply called “Mike”.

“Mike” says, “his boss has always been a Machiavellian, arrogant and condescending jerk, but lately he’s 10 times worse.”

Also in the MSNBC story was a quote from Sandy Gluckman who is the author of “Who’s in the Driver’s Seat: Using Spirit to Lead Successfully”. Gluckman says of mean bosses: “The more fearful they get, the more their ego takes control and the meaner they get. The meaner they are, the more the team shuts down and the less they are able to perform.”

How Mean Are You?

If you’re an employer or business owner, you know the economy is bad but why take it out on the ones that work for you? You hand-picked them right? Why put them down because you’re under pressure?

Here’s one way to tell if you’re a horrible boss. Ask your spouse or partner. Most of us talk about our work life with spouses or partners and while they love us, they may be the most honest when it comes to our work attitude and leadership style.

If you discuss your bad behaviors with your spouse or partner, they’ll be the best to advise you on how bad you really are—and you should listen to them!

It’s not just the business owners who are mean—their supervisors are mean as well because the bad behavior starts at the top and flows down. If the supervisor is being verbally abused, the supervisor will in turn, abuse those beneath him.

If you think you may have fallen into the trap of being a bad and horrible boss why not step back and look at yourself? Why not take a class on interpersonal skills or how to get along with employees or co-workers?

You may think you’re safe but it only takes one employee to run to the EEOC, Department of Labor or a labor law attorney and that could end up taking up years of your time along with large out-of-pocket attorney expenses. And, if the employee wins, you’ve got a blemish for life.

So, how mean are you?

Image Credits: 

watcharakun / FreeDigitalPhotos.net 

chrisroll / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Chrysler’s Success Shouldn’t Be Promoted Without Mentioning Losses

UPDATE 3/27/12: I missed two very important elements in this post. The first being, even though Chrysler was allowed to shut dealerships down and take their franchise points away, they still expected dealers to pay for ALL monies outstanding to Chrysler AND for special tools or equipment Chrysler ships to dealers whether they want them or not. I've seen some dealer invoices where dealers were asked to pay in excess of $100,000 to Chrysler, even though they were closed down! I ask you on this first one, if a dealership is shut down, how are they supposed to pay these bills with no business coming in?

Secondly, Any dealership vendors, banks, landlords or other commitments were not considered in the closures--nor was any help provided by Chrysler so in the end, again with no business coming in, most dealers were forced to file bankruptcy, ruining their credit scores, their lives and careers as well as the lives of their employees. Back when Chrysler still had Plymouth, they did indeed reimburse dealers when that franchise was deleted. Large dealers often received compensation from the lack of a Plymouth franchise in excess of $200,000! Many dealers could have benefited from the same help if dealers were offered some sort of compensation upon shutdown to avoid all of this. But again, we dealers were only considered useless assets!

This past Sunday on the TV show 60 Minutes (CBS), Steve Kroft reported on the recovery of Chrysler after it almost fell to the wayside in 2009 in a story, “Resurrecting  Chrysler.”

If you know me, I’m fond of calling Barack Obama the Auto Czar. He appointed a team of flunkies, including Steve Rattner who was head of Obama’s Auto Task Force to “fix” the auto industry. Rattner was also interviewed in the 60 Minutes story.

It’s the kind of rah, rah story that frankly pisses me off!

First off, I having nothing against Sergio Marchionne the CEO of Fiat/Chrysler who came to their rescue perhaps a little too late and after President Obama’s Auto Task Force allowed and even recommended Chrysler rid itself of some “useless assets.”

If news reporter Steve Kroft thinks the Chrysler/Fiat deal was “an American style success story” he needs to dig a little deeper.

Kroft does point out “much of the credit (for saving Chrysler) goes to the U.S. taxpayers, and to Chrysler workers who accepted wage and benefit cuts.” Thanks for that Steve—it’s nice to remind us of the truth!

It’s a touching story (link below) but unfortunately, it only talks about Chrysler at the corporate level, not their franchises, their dealerships or the owners and employees of those dealerships.

In April of 2009, Chrysler was allowed to rid itself of useless assets and took away franchise points of 789 dealerships – approximately 25 percent of its dealers in total, according to Cars.com.  You can read a 40-page list of those closed here; delivered promptly to the public by Automotive News in 2009.

The more I watched the report, as a former Chrysler dealer, the  madder I got. I had heard the show would be reporting on Chrysler’s survival on a promo spot on CBS and was anxious to hear if at least now, someone, anyone would talk about these closed dealerships,  their owners and their employees. To my dismay, the story missed the mark here—none of the 789 closed dealerships were mentioned.

I found a story in Car Dealer Insider, an automotive dealer management publication, offered by Nancy Phillips (May 2009): “Dealer Suicide: Not an Act of Cowardice”.  It’s more of a how-to story on how to deal with suicidal thoughts for dealers whose stores were closed, but it does mention one tiny tidbit no one ever talks about. The tidbit: “Car Dealer Insider is aware of several franchised dealers who took their own lives in recent months.”

This is the problem I have. If you search for suicide statistics on Chrysler closed dealerships—you can’t find any. Even though Car Dealer Insider says they are “aware of several franchised dealers” that did indeed commit suicide.

It’s these suicides and financial ruin everyone fears discussing and I wonder why? Why, when we discuss Chrysler/Fiat do we only talk about how successful it is now at the corporate level? Why dismiss those who are the meat and potatoes of every auto manufacturer—the dealerships that sell and repair their vehicles and deal with customers when recalls, breakdowns or technical issues occur?

Consumers can’t talk to Chrysler engineers. Sure they can call Customer Service but the folks answering these calls simply refer the complaints back to the selling dealership to “fix” the problem—it’s never handled at the corporate level—ever.

I know this because beyond being a former Chrysler dealer, my husband also worked for the Chrysler Corporation before we bought our franchise. I know what happens at the corporate level. I know the inside stuff other’s don’t know.

You see, car dealerships—even the big ones, do have an atmosphere of “family.” Most dealers became successful via dedication to their organization, vision and mission. They are proud folks who think of their employees as an extension of themselves. If they do have to lay-off an employee, they don’t just think about the employee, but also their spouse and children.

When Chrysler was allowed to rid itself of 789 useless assets, this is why so many dealers became troubled, filed for bankruptcy and even the unthinkable—committed suicide—yet no one ever talks about it.

I like to tell people I’m a useless asset according to Steve Rattner and Obama’s Auto Task Force. Some think it’s a joke when I tout this where others don’t even know what I mean.

When the 60 Minutes’ story was finished I looked over to my husband who had watched the piece with me. “I’ll have to write about that!” I told him.

In the end, all I want is for a story about Chrysler’s fall and rise to include the 789 useless assets—even mention a name or two. Why not interview a former dealer? Why not include these people who had to start their lives over again? Is it because interviewing Sergio Marchionne is more impressive?

I am here to challenge any well-respected reporter in the future who wants to take on the statistics of Chrysler’s fall and rise to include former dealers closed down with nowhere to turn. Why leave out those hurt the most?

Investigative journalists are always the first to attack dealerships. They cheat people, they charge too much, they’re an awful group of folks. But, when it comes to reporting on the statistical facts of Chrysler suicides, shutdowns and ruin, investigative reporters turn their backs on these issues.

Why is that? It’s like reporting on a school closing but not telling the audience which school is actually closing. It’s like saying a Republican candidate won the state of Ohio but not reporting which candidate actually won the state.

Come on, even 60 Minutes can’t do it right! Where is the justice in all of this? Unfortunately, tiny little me can promote this blog post, but if I called up 60 Minutes and said, “Hey, I can help you here,” I’m sure I’d get some customer pleaser who would take my message and I’d never get a call back. Maybe a letter saying thanks but no thanks. This is just an American shame and as a writer, blogger and freelancer, I feel embarrassed even our most beloved investigative journalists like Steve Kroft can’t get it right.

So, come on—any well-known investigative reporter takers on this? I didn’t think so.

Sources:

Kroft, Steve - 60 Minutes, "Resurrecting Chrysler" March 25, 2012, retrieved March 26, 2012.

Phillips, Nancy - Car Dealer Insider, "Dealer Suicide: Not an Act of Cowardice" May 2009, retrieved March 26, 2012.

Thomas, David – Cars.com – “789 Chrysler Dealers to Close byJune 9” May 14, 2009, retrieved March 26, 2012.

Image Credit: Chrysler Logo - Vascer / Wikimedia Commons

Are You Buying an IPad3? If So, I’ll Take Your iPad2!

A recent visit from my fanatical, you, must must, must have an iPad son-in-law left me wondering how many folks will actually shell out bucks for an iPad3 when they already have version one or two? And, my husband (his father-in-law) asked my Apple-frenzy son-in-law if he was going to buy a new iPad3, if we could have his iPad2? All we got were weird stares!

In reality, you’re either a PC person or an Apple person and I guess I’m stuck in between! In fact, is anyone really totally Apple or totally PC? It seems to me the number of must-have gadgets in my house are from a plethora of manufacturers.

After I started using Google Chrome, I found it’s very similar to Apple’s OS—at least to me so I don’t need an Apple computer I’ve decided.

When it comes to iTunes, I do enjoy this Apple venue and while I don’t have or want an iPod, I do have an Apple TV where I can listen to my downloaded iTunes music just fine—comes through loud, clear and crisp via my Bose sound system.

If I don’t feel like walking to the entertainment center to get my Logitech Harmony remote to turn on my Apple TV, I can also listen to my songs via my laptop but the sound is not that great.

I don’t like cable but I have both Dish and DirectTV because DirectTV allows me to be a SuperFan when it’s NFL football season. Why not just choose DirectTV over Dish? I like Dish better as far as the customer service they provide and the channel line-up.

I have a Cannon digital camera that works just fine but apparently it’s not good enough according to my son-in-law. I don’t think they make an Apple Camera but apparently my camera is missing lots of features and it’s not waterproof. Hmm? I should check into this because I would like it if my camera was more user-friendly—it really isn’t unless you get the manual and God only knows where I put that!

I use a Conair hair dryer and if I “feel” like styling my  hair, I have a Conair curling brush-type gadget for that.

Thankfully every single appliance in my home is made by General Electric so at least I can say I’m loyal to one company as far as appliances go—except for my HDTVs. I have an LG, a Samsung and some weird model in the game room whose name escapes me. 

I think I have a Logitech mouse for the PC upstairs but the two laptops we have possess those touch-type mouses (is it mices?). I’m confused!

When I have to attend a conference call via Skype, I also have Logitech headphones and my sister who I often conference with says she just bought headphones but can’t make them work with Skype so our conference call head person in charge always has to call her house phone to connect her to the conversation. Hmm? Operator error? I bet she doesn’t have as many brands of gadgets as I do but I also bet she’s happier she doesn’t.

My one laptop is a Lenovo and it’s a great laptop (watch it will die right after I write this blog post). In fact, don’t tell my Apple son-in-law but when it’s time for my laptop to go to laptop heaven, I’ll probably buy another Lenovo.  

My husband’s laptop doesn’t really have a name on it. It was “built” by computer Georgie. I’m sure there’s a serial number somewhere and we could probably find out what kind it really is, but who cares right? It would just be another brand I’d have to remember.

I learned how to play Words with Friends and Draw with Friends while my son-in-law was  here. I’m addicted to these Zynga apps now and almost downloaded a few more but then I’d be just playing on my HTC Droid Incredible all day instead of working—that’s not good right?

I tried to tell my son-in-law (who also has an iPhone and insists I should too) that any smartphone, including Apple does come with limits—especially for me! The screen size is too, too small for this baby boomer. He tried to show me how big I could blow up the screen on the iPhone but like Shania Twain once sang, “That don’t impress me much!” I want a BIGGERSCREEN!

I also have a Kindle with Wi-Fi 3G and I love that! Apparently, however, it’s not as good as a Kindle Fire which comes with color and well my Apple son-in-law says his iPad does way more than any Kindle could ever do! Hmm?

I don’t want an iPad but I’d surely take his iPad2 if he’s going to spend money on the third version of this must-have tablet. I should really piss him off and buy a Samsung Galaxy tablet—at least the brand would match one of my HDTVs.

I agree with most that Apple’s products are too expensive. And, beyond that, Apple is always enticing us to buy another version—often only a few months after the last version came out! I’m sure Apple will soon end its support for the iPad1 and I feel for those folks. I bet if my son-in-law had an iPad1 and was switching to the new iPad3, he’d give me the 1 and laugh and laugh at my frustration when I found out support for the device ended in 2011 (just kidding here—I’m sure Apple still supports iPad1).

So, how many brands of gadgets do you have? If you’re like my son-in-law, not only do you have Apple,  you have other brands of gadgets. I especially enjoy his microwave which according to him is “Powered by Google and Connected to Skype” so it can reach the desired temp to cook food. Well, microwaving isn’t really cooking is it? Hmm?

Image Credit: Apple iPad Matt Buchanan / Wikimedia Commons

What Business Owners Can Learn From Visiting Relatives

For real you’re asking! I’m a small entrepreneur!  What in the world can I possibly learn from visiting relatives other than the old saying “They stink like fish after a few days?” Believe it or not, you’d be surprised and you may be guilty of some of the faux pas we found!

My daughter, son-in-law and grandson recently visited Austin for a week—they hail from Wasilla Alaska. During our one-week, full-of-fun trip, I learned a lot from the businesses we visited—both good and bad.

Fredericksburg Texas

This is a German heritage mecca—well at least their website says they are.  I’m not sure I get the “German” influence here except for one beer pub producing German ale—yes you can buy and drink beer on the streets and a German restaurant boasting German food and tasty delights from this historic country. They also claim fame to lots of shopping and here’s where Fredericksburg falls flat.

We arrived at around noon, ate lunch at a wonderful café where you can get Pie on a stick—Yum—and then started our shopping adventure. Main Street does have a lot of shops but they close early—real early, some at 4 or 5 p.m. and after 6 p.m., unless you want to eat,  your shopping adventure is done.

The Lesson: I could literally open any type of store in Fredericksburg and keep it open until 8 p.m.—even later and I know I’d sell stuff because there were so many folks walking the streets looking for something to buy at 6 p.m. but had no-where to turn. Tourists don’t want to leave a place they’ve driven to without a trinket or two!

San Antonio River Walk

This is a free place to visit (except for parking) and it’s full of fun, history, eateries and boat tours. You can even take a boat taxi to the shopping mall! The boat tour companies need a business lesson or two. For $8 bucks ($2-6 for kids depending on age) you get stuffed (literally) into an open barge-type boat with a tour guide.

First off, you are constantly kicked by your neighbor and if that’s not bad enough, the tour guide is impossible to hear—at least clearly. I heard people laughing but only those sitting closest to him benefited. And, for a state so military enhanced, you’d think they’d offer a military discount.

The Lesson: These companies have tons of boats and the line moves quickly because they pack as many people as possible in one boat. I’d make the seating arrangements more attractive—more like row seating, not side-by-side and equip the boats with better sound systems. They need to pay attention to our military folks as well—many visit the River Walk after boot camp graduation. As far as dining goes, how many ice cream and tacos can one eat in a day? Be innovative restaurateurs and come up with something unique? How about Pie on a stick?

Sea World (San Antonio)

You really can’t say much about the Shamu show—these large mammals are the main attraction and do pay attention to the “Splash Zone” seat warnings because YOU WILL GET WET—VERY WET. There’s also a great show called Azul and it’s a must-see if visiting Sea World.

It’s nice there’s a one-price ticket to enter all events (ride-included tickets are also available) and there are lots of benches for old grandparents like me. My daughter, son-in-law and grandson got in for free because he’s Air Force—he even got 30 percent off all food (except the buffet in the park) and discounts on rides.

For our eating adventure, we chose the buffet in the park promising cheeseburgers, hot dogs, potato salad, chips, condiments galore and drinks with free refills. This place was horrible so don’t waste your money! The food was cold, the drink line (which you must do first before you get food) was so long with one person handing out drink requests of Coca Cola products and much of the food promised wasn’t found!  When we arrived there were no cheeseburgers, only cold hot dogs, dried out buns, something that looked like pudding and the potato salad was nowhere to be found! When workers did come out to refill food, gone were our hopes of a hot cheeseburger and instead we got hamburgers with no cheese and they were cold to boot.

The Lesson: Eight bucks is a lot for this kind of food. Sure it was nice to eat by the lake but where is the supervision on replacing food and keeping it hot? It’s really not that hard and I felt I was robbed—big time. This eatery needs some supervision and better heating equipment.

Austin Bat Tours

There are a few companies offering bat tours on Lady Bird Lake. If you don’t know what a bat tour is, it’s just what it sounds like—you’re on a boat, have a tour guide and he takes you to the bridges where bats fly from all directions making for quite the scene!

These bat boat tours are cheap and our family of 4 adults and 1 kid got in for around $30 bucks. You can BYOB and even food if you want although the tour only lasts one hour so we brought an entire picnic with no time to dig in and eat.

These bat boats seem to tour all day long and I have a problem with “bat tours” and “daylight.” There are no bats if you take the day tours so stop calling those tours “bat tours!” Call them Downtown Austin Scenic Tours on Lady Bird Lake but skip anything that even hints you’ll see a bat.

We luckily chose the 7 p.m. tour so we did see bats and it was exciting. The tour guide was funny and I learned a lot about the buildings in downtown Austin. The guide even pointed out a dog park which is leash-free with a place where dogs can swim—no human swimming, however. This guide knew his stuff and was well prepared.

The Lesson:  These boat tour companies need to describe what you’ll actually be seeing depending on the time you take your one-hour boat tour based on the time of day. In addition, do not pack a big family picnic because you won’t have time to eat it—nor do they provide any place near the boat launch where you can sit on picnic tables and enjoy your food before or after the tour.  I’d like to see them change the names of boat tours based on content and time of day and heck, put up some picnic tables near where these boats launch! We ended up walking into the Hilton, pretending we were guests and utilized the tables by the hotel pool. I know—this last part was wrong but heck, my husband looks important—he’s got that walk and possesses an atmosphere of “Don’t you know who I am?” My daughter also inherited this same trait; unfortunately my son-in-law and I ate uncomfortably looking for Hilton Hotel security! The grandkid? He could care less!

So, you can see there are indeed some things these tourist attraction, inviting, must-visit towns and venues could improve on—it only takes a little innovation and in the instance of the bat tours—a free and simple name change!

How will you change your business this Spring and Summer? If you're a business owner in Texas, leave me a comment on your seasonal success or ideas!

Image Credit: San Antonio River Walk Boat Tour by J Scheid

Reality Shows: Big Business, Big Bucks

Browsing through Google Trends today I found a plethora of news reports and blog posts on the season finale of The Bachelor (ABC). I’m not a fan of the show, never watched it, nor have I seen The Bachelorette. I guess the premise is a bunch of greedy, backstabbing women fight for the attention of the “bachelor” and are voted off one by one until—yep you guessed it—the bachelor chooses one and proposes. Same deal for The Bachelorette.

Reality show stars are making big bucks these days. A blog post on Chron.com by Amanda L. Grossman, “How Much are Financial Reality TV Stars Paid, and Does it Interfere with Reality” said many stars can achieve up to $750 a week where top stars (think Jon and Kate) asked for and received around $75,000 per episode—well maybe some agents were involved to gain these big bucks but $750 a week ain’t bad.

How to Get In

Do a Google search and you’ll find casting offers for these reality shows—most require a video of how stupid (or interesting) you are which to me means the weirder you are, the better. These casting directors look for nerds, bullies, bitches (think Snooki here) and those who are well, just plain stupid. And—they pay them!

So, the opportunities are there but whether you get in or not depends on the casting director, the show and I guess your reality “Q” rating. I don’t think I’d be good on a reality show but my daughter came up with a grand idea for a reality show and we’ve even scripted some of it!

Name:  Billyland

Premise: Billy’s first wife (Joanne) and second wife (me) and our daughter (Rachel) and our life lessons, triumphs, sad times and the humorous of living in Billyland. Actually “Billyland” is a pretty fun place and we think it would make for great entertainment and pull in huge ratings for whatever network picks up our show. You can get an idea how funny we Scheids are by reading this post!

You see, I get along fine with my husband’s first wife and she, my daughter, son-in-law Alan and grandson Gabe all live in Wasilla Alaska—in fact the ex does lives right across the street! I have often said if something ever happened to “Billy” I would move in with the ex. I mean they say when people remarry they often choose similar personality types and me and Joanne would get along fine sharing expenses in our older years.

We’d have scenes where Joanne and I could fight over who had the best times with Billy. Ones where daughter Rachel would step in and plead with us to stop arguing and son-in-law Alan would mostly hide in his man cave, appear on an episode or two and if things were slow he could initiate a fight or two and return to his solace.

We’re not sure we’d want to include Grandson Gabe—that might be a little like child abuse (at least we think so). As far as appearances by the man himself—“Billy” would it be best to have him appear on the show or just have pictures of him everywhere? Again, it’s still in the idea stage.

What Are You Watching? 

I’m simply amazed at how many reality shows are on TV these days and they’re not confined to just one network—they’re everywhere!

I must admit I have been a fan of Survivor (CBS) since its inception and I do tape it if I’m not home or if I’m involved in something else making it impossible to view it—but that’s really it. As far as Dancing with the Stars (ABC), Jersey Shore (Style) and any of the “Real Housewives” (Bravo) I skip all those but it does seem like more and more are popping up all the time.

The lesson here? There is a lot of Hollywood money in this type of entertainment and some reality show stars have become quite well known. As far as this writer goes, however, I don’t need to watch American Idol (FOX) or The Voice (NBC). I figure if a star is born, I’ll find out on Google Trends and the reality show loop searching will begin again for me—it’s actually pretty boring but a good time waster during lunch.

So, what reality show do you watch? Come on, be honest, you’ve got to be hooked to a least one!  Drop me a comment and let me know—I’m trying to conduct a non-scientific poll here! You can remain anonymous, I swear by my Survivor official buff!

Grossman, Amanda L., Chron.com – Reality Show Post

Image Credit: Nectarwmn / Wikimedia Commons

Dahmer Groupon Offer Not So Great: Was the Business Offering Worth the Attention?

I found an  article on WebProNews written by Chris Crum on the Groupon offer where folks would receive a discount on what were called Dahmer Tours.

I’m not sure who is behind these tours but apparently, the deal was for a 90-minute tour for 2 people discounted from $60 to $35 and bless their souls, they even elected to use the promotional tool, “buy it for a friend!”  Nice gift huh?

The 90-minute tour didn’t take folks inside Dahmer’s old home but instead, it lead you through the streets where Dahmer preyed on victims, enticed them and well, as the Groupon offer stated:

“Things that go bump in the night keep us awake by invading our dreams and loudly honking car horns every 30 seconds. Give yourself the creeps with this Groupon.”

Sure this seems weird and because the families who had relatives that were victims of Dahmer, Groupon took the offer down and rightly so.

Good or Bad Idea, It’s Still Advertising!

This made me think about an advertisement in a newspaper I saw for a handyman service (actually I’ve seen it used to advertise other products) but in large print, the ad said “WIFE WANTED!” Curious, I read the ad only to find it was an ad for a handyman company but it did serve its purpose. It got me to read the ad. And heck, what if at that exact moment I needed a handyman but had no idea where to look?

The Dahmer Groupon offer isn’t the same, but think about this for a moment. How many gruesome folks out there will remember the offer, visit Milwaukee and take them up on the $60 tour with no discount—I bet more than you think!

Being Innovative in Your Advertising

I would advise skipping some like visit the Grim Reaper at our free event (unless it’s Halloween) but what about some other unique offering that entices customers to your door?

One idea for a plant and tree nursery might be, buy a tree; get a dead one for free. I know what you’re thinking—what in the world could a customer do with a dead tree? Some will come to see what it’s all about where others  will come buy a tree to see if they can save the free dead tree. You may get some folks looking for kindling for outdoor grills or poolside fireplaces for Spring entertainment use or maybe they’re working on a craft project and need what your tree has! Whatever the reason, people will be curious.

Another way to pull them in is to advertise a longer campaign. Have every male staff member grow beards and advertise their progress regularly—in print and on your website. Inform your customers when the big shave time comes that they too can participate in the shave and then donate the hair to a children’s cancer hospital. If you can get a local celebrity involved in the shaving, that’s even better!  People may show up because they felt the customer service they received from a male staff member was terrible and want to convey that via a horrible shave, but most will be enticed by the idea—and because it’s for charity, all the better!

Plan, Do and Act!

These are only two (well three if you’re as brave as Groupon) but you can think of some of your own. Be outrageous! Be innovative! Grab your customer’s attention anyway you can as long as you don’t break the law!

I realize the family of Dahmer’s family did have a case and pulling the ad was the right thing to do, but I’m telling you, if I ever go to Milwaukee, I’d take the tour!

And, even though the Groupon offer has been taken down, that doesn’t mean folks will forget about it soon and in fact, it was a Google Trend for three entire days! Can you be that innovative? Sure you can!

I guess I could advertise my Dentist in New Mexico was once the prison dentist where Dahmer was incarcerated and did work on his teeth before he died. While he didn’t advertise this, it did intrigued me and heck, I just love telling that story just to hear people say “Ewwwwwwwwww!” True story though!

Crum, Chris – WebPro News – “Jeffrey Dahmer Tours on Groupon Don’t Go Over Too Well” March 3, 2012, retrieved March 6, 2012. 

Image Credit: Dan / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Business Owners: Don’t Say One Thing and Do Another!

It’s Sunday—my favorite day! It’s the day I run to the driveway, retrieve my Austin American-Statesman and head to my comfy chair with a BIG glass of iced coffee!

This morning, an article by Eric Dexheimer, “Court Cost to Go to Other Uses” caught my eye and quite frankly, reminded me of mistake all business owners make – the old bait and switch.

Long before I moved to Texas, the 1997 Legislature passed into law what is called “The Fugitive Apprehension Fund” The fund’s purpose? To help police find missing parolees and catch fugitives. Sounds like a great idea?

The principle is everyone convicted of any crime must pay and assessment fee into the fund. In April of 2011, the fund was just sitting there, apparently not being used to apprehend criminals. The pot: $135 million! The state’s comptroller announced “the purpose for which the funds were collected is moot” so those fugitive dollars were pulled to the state’s general operating account. What will the state do with the money now?

A brandy new statewide emergency radio system! That’s a broken promise to taxpayers and well, criminals. And, the fees keep rolling in. They don’t call the fund “The Fugitive Apprehension Fund” anymore; in reality, it has no name.

I guess good names for the fund could be as simple as the “Radio Emergency Fund” Or my favorite, the “Marilyn Monroe Fund” for her quote: “It’s true! I had nothing on! I had the radio on!” Maybe tough guy criminals would be happier to pay a fee just thinking about the beauty of Monroe? It’s a thought.

The Fees

Assessment fees are different based on the crime. For example, a big bad crime means a fee of $133 and crimes not so felonious are only $40. Beyond these two fees, even more money is raked into the new emergency radio fund via other fees. According to the American-Statesman, “There is a records management fee, a clerks’ fee, a county and district court technology fee and a courthouse security fee.”  And that’s not all!

Eric Dexheimer’s story points out more fees:

*$50 if you’re caught and you have a warrant.

*$5 if you’re caught without a warrant.

*$5 to go directly to jail and $5 when released.

*DWI folks have to pay what is called a “visual recording fee” although the amount of the fee is unclear.

*Those committed of sex fines must pay a $250 DNA fee (I’m fine with this fee).

*And, if you can’t pay all these itemized fees, there’s a fee to set up a payment program—that’s an additional $25 along with $2 transaction and management fee.

Attorney’s Scratch Heads

So, this once great idea and promised fund to get felons off our streets is gone baby gone—even if the fees are still with us—they just go to the radio fund instead.

Defense attorneys claim they can’t make sense of all the fees and have a hard time explaining the long list of fees to their clients (everyone deserves the right to counsel so don’t yell at me).  I can only imagine offering Igor the felon a long attorney’s bill including all the fees much like a hospital bill. “I don’t think so dude, I done my time. I ain’t paying this s___!”

I also wonder how many attorneys are forced to absorb these fees or enlist debt collectors to ruin the credit of convicts who have indeed “done their time.” Jeez to ruin great credit scores doesn’t seem fair! I mean if you get 5-10 and you had a past bankruptcy, when you get out, it’s probably not listed on your credit report anymore, but uncollected fees change all that.

Business Owner Lesson

As I stated earlier, business owners can learn a lot from this promise of a fund, only to change it without informing the state’s residents—or convicts.

Let’s say you own a flower / gift shop and for every dozen of flowers you sell, you promise a scented candle is thrown in for free. Your customers love you! You advertise the free candle and then suddenly, you change the game!

Instead of a free scented candle, you throw in a 10 cent keychain. This scenario is only one; there are business owners out there that do this all the time. Start a program, advertise the hell out of it, get lots of customers and then, change the prize at the end.

A sure-fire way to lose loyal customers (and referrals)!

If you start a promotion, keep it up and phase it out gently by something just as attractive.

Blip – Blip

I’m not sure how I feel about all this money slated for one purpose (to catch fugitives) now being used for an emergency radio fee. I guess part of the radio emergency fee could include some sounds when the airwaves pass by a criminal—maybe a little blip-blip that’s directed to police who could in turn, go get the fugitive.

For goodness sakes Texas lawmakers—share the fee! Why not a dual purpose fee? On the other hand, I do wonder how much of that $135 million (that keeps rising) went to conferences in Hawaii or golf outing days near Lady Bird Lake.

This is just not fair and a bait and switch tactic—and a bad one at that!

 Dexheimer, Eric, March 4, 2012 - Read moreabout the fund here

 ImageCredit / Africa / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Does Your Business Use “Password1”? You’re Damned if You Do!

Oh leave it to Google News to brighten my day—everyday! I found a CNN Money story by Stacy Cowley “If You’re Using ‘Password1,’ Change it Now.” Really?

Apparently, this password is very popular for IT geniuses who install servers. Why? According to Cowley’s article, “…the reason for Password1’s popularity: "it has an upper-case  letter, a number and nine characters.” The story went on to say apparently this (password) “satisfies the complexity rules for many systems.” This includes Microsoft’s Active Directory identity management software.

I don’t know about you, but Microsoft is pretty popular unless you’re my son-in-law who says someday, “I too will be assimilated to Apple.” Nah, don’t think so dude!

I guess ‘Password1’ comes up around 5 percent of the time and second in line is really awesome—it’s ‘welcome.’ The one that really surprised me are the IT Mensa installers who think leaving the password section blank is a grand idea.

When I was running two businesses with two servers, my IT guy’s passwords were so very complex, we had to often either find the piece of paper my husband wrote them on or call IT Georgie. Somehow I don’t think IT Georgie would ever use passwords this easy to break, but apparently IT servers everywhere have these passwords and those nasty folks are hacking in.

Some people even use ‘Password1’ on their smartphones – how smart I must say!

I’m no IT expert and my friends will tell you as a Baby Boomer, I’m no digital media expert either. I’m confused about #FF on Twitter, I want to Retweet but don’t know how and as far as the new Facebook timeline goes I don’t like it! Why do I want to see a timeline that goes back to 1959! Jeez Facebook come on now!

Still, this popular security feature needs some attention! Experts say using @#5LX&(((578 may be a good password because who’s going to guess that or a variation of that?

I love watching movies and television shows where the police labs or crooks use a password breakers and you see what looks like a slot machine with every changing numbers, letters and symbols twirling around. Every once in a while, one will stop and there are screams of delight—we’re almost in! Really? Is it that easy?

If it is, I guess I want in on it. I’m not sure what server I’d want to hack but it would probably be a large pet retailer. Why you ask? I have six dogs—they are all BIG dogs and not what my husband and I like to call the “kick me” variety. If they jump on you, your chest sinks. If they step on your foot, you get a broken toe, etc.

We use around 150 pounds of dog food a month and they love toys. One dog toy alone can cost around nine bucks! And, all my precious little dogs do is tear them apart until they find the squeaky insert or pull all the stuffing out. I’m fond of those dog toys that say “no stuffing.” Great for the company that developed them, but they aren’t “rip proof!”

My Pit Bull Louie can eat a long rawhide chew in two bites and its gone. Rawhide bones are not cheap either. They all love playing pretty physically and I have to replace collars and dog tags often so I know who they are—you try remembering six dog names!

I got in trouble once with the folks that make the smart fortwo car. First I thought it was sort of dumb to not put the words ‘smart’ and ‘fortwo’ in proper case but that’s not really what angered them. As I was reading the specs for the smart fortwo, they pointed out the Tridion cell (apparently it’s ok to capitalize Tridion) is developed using the walnut shell principal.

What this means is if you’re in a wreck in the smart fortwo, you won’t break, but roll. I begged to differ as Pit Bull Louie can also break a walnut in two bites and that baby’s gone! Anyway, I got a letter from some senior VP who went on and on about how safe the smart fortwo is but if you’ve seen them, they may be “smart” but they are really small—give me a big ass SUV any day!

So, what’s your password? If it’s your last name, that’s sort of dumb too! If your business name is ABC Hardware and your password is ‘Abchardware’ that’s also dumb.

Actually I’m not really shocked about the simplicity of passwords. With technology changing so fast, these IT guys and gals are busy folks. I wonder what passwords they use on their home systems. Hmmm? I wonder how many cereal box tops I have to save to get a password decoder ring.

CNN Money Story, retrieved 3/2/12

Image Credit: thanunkorn / FreeDigitalPhotos.net